Something angry. olitical, personal embarrassing.

[pecunium]

Feel free to comment, but be aware you do so at your peril.

I just lost my cool. It's been a hard couple of days. I am pondering a couple of major changes in my life, which is stress. I was drafted to the estate sale at the last minute, and did it out of duty, not real desire.

I've had little sleep, for the past two days and then...

The guys here (I came down to do some gaming) started talking about the Marines shooting injured people in Falluja. I happen to have stong opinions about it. There are mitigating circumstances, but that is all they are. Fear, anger etc. don't give one a by. A crime of passion is still a crime.

The response to this was people who accuse me of having a lack of moral fibre, because I disagree on things relating to religion, engaging in moral relativism. See, the Marines were scared, and some people had been faking dead, when they were only injured, so they could kill attack Marines, so that made it not only understandable, but correct to shoot anyone who looked funny.

That sort of thing irritates me. Having this soft, civilian fuck, who has never had spent any real time in a place where life and death were actualy at stake tell me, not once, not twice, but three times, that I didn't understand what it was like, well I lost it.

Screaming at him that I most certainly did. No content. No reason. No explanation that he was being relativistic (he'd already discounted the facts, and was saying that if the men hadn't left before the Marines stopped letting them (some three weeks before the attack started) then they deserved to get killed, even though if the situation were reversed, he'd be shooting at people who acted like we did.

Nope. I was just yelling that I had been there. I had to be shut up. Told to chill. Which was right. I was over the line in the level of my reponse.

I don't think I was wrong, and I'm not sorry for laying into the him. I am sorry I blew up. I am even sorrier that I am in that contained mode I was in when I was fresh out of theater.

Terry is not a happy camper right now.

Comments

[lawgeekgurl.livejournal.com]

I do not pretend to know what the Marines in Iraq (or anyone on the front line) has to deal with. I do understand human failings. It's understandable that people do things that are normally unthinkable, if they're in a war and fighting for their lives. It's horrible, because there are no winners. We don't want the war, we hate what happens during the war, so how do we respond when we see things that happen that horrify us that happen during war? If we were against the war to begin with, we demonize the warriors, and say "if we hadn't been there, that wouldn't have happened; see, that just proves the reality of an unjustified war." They ignore that no matter if it's "justified" or not, people at war react in a way they wouldn't if they were at peacetime.

I don't have any answers, but I do understand.